Future (Nearly) Perfect: Hardware

Before tonight I had never seen director Richard Stanley's oft-talked about film (at least in genre circles) Hardware (1990). I'd gone this far without seeing the film in one of its many unofficial releases, no VHS dupes or under-the-table convention sales for me. All I can say is: good things come to those who wait.

I say that because hands-down the best part of Hardware is the visuals, and that's saying something when a film includes cameos from not only Iggy Pop but also Lemmy Kilmister from Motörhead!

The story concerns a soldier, Moses (Dylan McDermott), who brings home a robotic skull for his shut-in artist girlfriend, Jill (Stacey Travis), to use in one of her pieces. The skull is actually a Government funded android soldier that re-assembles itself. As we all know government funded androids are never friendly, mayhem ensues.

The film is set in a post-apocalyptic dystopia that is one part Mad Max, one part Blade Runner with a dash of Orwell-ian paranoia. Stanley and his cinematographer Steven Chivers do a wonderful job bringing us from the macro to the micro in the first ten minutes or so, giving us a taste of the world outside before locking us in one dilapidated apartment building for the rest of the film.

I enjoyed Stanley's other genre feature Dust Devil (1992, Subversive Cinema released a disc a few years back), but didn't quite see what all the hoopla was about. For me Hardware was the exact opposite, I came in not knowing what to expect and was very pleasantly surprised. How this film is not a classic (at least a fringe one) I cannot puzzle out. Stanley himself seems to be a bit of a divisive figure, with some critics throwing the word pretentious around. I don't see that at all: I'm a fan of any filmmaker who can visually reference Dali and Bunuel's Un chien andalou (1929) in a film about a killer robot who kills people with a powerdrill/phalis.

The film is not perfect (it really gets lost in cliches in the last half hour, but not enough to spoil the freshness and beauty of what came before it) but there is absolutely NO arguing against the disc itself. Severin Films: I love you. For the unfamiliar Severin bills themselves as the "Criterion of Smut." They've done a fantastic disc of the original Inglorious Bastards (1978), a bunch of Jess Franco films (which all had very entertaining interviews with the man himself) and one of my all-time favorite discs Lucio Fulci's Perversion Story (which ranks so highly because it includes a CD of the amazing soundtrack to the film).

They really went overboard with Hardware. Not only is the transfer colorful and sharp (why did I not get the Blu-ray? Doh!) but there are a bunch of great features on the second disc. The crown jewel being an hour long documentary that covers inception, pre-production, production, and release/reception (including an explanation why the film has gone so long without a proper release) and includes interviews with nearly all the major players (except Dylan McDermott). There is also a feature where Stanley discusses the sequel he wrote for the film, which sounds awesome (even though the director comes off as slightly loony) but will sadly never happen. Also included are three short films, one being the original super 8 version of what would become Hardware, and a few deleted/extended scenes.

If you're hungry for some cross-genre action or crave a little more food-for-thought with your gore: pick this up!

Not too Baaad: Animalada

Argentinian filmmaker Sergio Bizzio's Animalada (2001) makes the viewer sensational promises in its first thirty minutes that the film never really fulfills. That's not to say that it is a bad film, actually it is quite an interesting mish-mash of different styles (Bizzio's influences seem to include such divergent talents as Hitchcock, early Peter Jackson and Pedro Almodovar) that culminates in a really gonzo final act that while not making much in the way of sense, is still fun.

The story concerns Alberto, a wealthy Buenos Aires resident summering in his country home with his wife when he falls in love with Fanny...a sheep. Alberto must try to keep his bizarre love affair under-wraps while increasingly strange events cause the bodies to pile up.You read that right: the film is a bestiality romantic horror comedy.

Bizzio's reach for artistic credibility with his otherwise silly subject matter is admirable. He tries to pack a bunch of satire and literary allusions into his film (the film has a particularly inspired opening that recalls Eugene Ionesco's classic absurdist play The Bald Soprano) but many of the arty touches in the second half only serve to bloat the film and weigh down the comedy.

The main problem with Animalada is one of pacing. Once the aforementioned first thrity minutes or so, the viewer expects the film to go wild and it does, but it still takes long pauses that seem like padding to get the film up to feature length.

I am a big fan of dark comedies and Animalada is similar in tone and style to one of my favorite filmmakers in the genre Alex de la Inglesia (1995's El dia de la Beastia, 2004's Crimen Ferpecto). Inglesia has seemed to have perfected the steady escalation in absurdity and mayhem that Bizzio's film seems to lack.

Gripes aside, Animalada is definitely filled with enough interesting ideas, genuine shocks and sick chuckles to warrant at least one viewing. It is available from Synapse Films, the crazies that bring you the 42nd Street Forever series.

Rock, Shock, and Loot : A Day at Rock And Shock 2009

Nestled in the beautiful town of Worcester, Massachusetts every year there is a small quiet meeting of like-minded, church going individuals. Did you buy that? I didn't think so.

Rock and Shock is an annual horror convention/horror themed concert series. I have yet to attend any of the concerts (although this year they had The Misfits, who I find enjoyable) but for the past four years I have gone to the convention.

This year the guest of honor was Malcolm McDowell, hence I was doubly excited. I have an inexplicably affinity for/fascination with 1979's Caligula (I wrote a ten page final paper on the film) and thus had to have Caligula himself sign my rare 2 LP soundtrack. Outside of having one of the coolest resume's in film history (If..., A Clockwork Orange, Time After Time) McDowell is also a real class act, taking time out to talk to and take pictures with fans.

Outside of the movie biz there are also a number of horror writers in attendance. I fulfilled a yearly tradition by harassing Jack Ketchum. This year I had him sign a Spanish language edition of The Crossings, much to the amusement of scream queen Tiffany Shepis who then performed an impromptu reading from the book.

Either my agoraphobia is getting worse or the convention has seemed to double in attendance each year I go. I arrived around 1 o'clock and the crowds were modest but by the time I left it had become nearly impossible to wind through the aisles of the dealer's room. Some highlights include on-site tattooing, artists, rare DVDs, make-up demonstrations and enough t-shirts to clothe a small country (I picked up a snazzy Night of the Bloody Apes shirt from The House of Mysterious Secrets).

I only had time to attend one panel, but it was a good one. Director John Landis is a riot. He spoke about everything from Gene Kelly and Ginger Rogers to how hilarious he finds the films of Roland Emmerich (His take on Independence Day: "I haven't laughed that hard since Richard Pryor") and gave some great anecdotes on his hits and misses(his stories from the set of Beverly Hills Cop 3 are classic). The interview really got me excited for Landis' return to features Burke and Hare a dark comedy staring Simon Pegg and David Tennant.

Rock and Shock doesn't quite have the appeal of New Jersey's Chiller Theatre, but then again it also does not have the decades of history behind it. Hopefully it will continue to grow and attract top level talent. For horror fans in the Boston area it is impossible not to recommend.

Crossing Lines: Crossed By Garth Ennis and Jacen Burrows

If you're familiar with the work of Garth Ennis (his comics classic Preacher or his newer superhero bashing opus The Boys, both of which are amazing, you should grab the trade paperbacks) then you know that he's not afraid of pushing reader's buttons. Be it organized religion or superman, Ennis will take it down to size. But if you haven't been reading Crossed, then, to paraphrase Bachman Turner Overdrive: you ain't seen nothing yet.

Crossed is Ennis and artist Jacen Burrows' new mini-series from Avatar Press, and while it takes ques from many end of the world "survival" stories, none have ever been this upsetting. That's not to say that Ennis' trademark pitch-black humor is missing here, there's just a lot less of it.

The setup is straight Romero with a twist. A group of strangers must band together to survive in a world gone crazy. The only problem is that this world didn't go zombie crazy, or even 28 Days Later "fast zombie" crazy, the infected in Crossed have become cunning, foul-mouthed rape/murder machines.

It's a tricky premise to pull off without veering too far into exploitation but I believe the team pulls it off perfectly. The violence is by no means glorified and many deaths take a big emotional toll on the reader even if the characters are not as fully fleshed out as they could be. The characters don't have to have huge back-stories to be sympathetic. The realistic art and small bits of characterization make them human, and that is all we need to empathize with their plight.

Burrows visualizes an abundance of gore but it is perhaps the tableaus before and after the violence that are the most disturbing part of his art.

It is most definitely not for everyone, but for the iron-stomached fan of writers like Richard Laymon or Edward Lee there is nothing in the horror comics field like Crossed.

Tradition Begats Tradition: Trick 'r Treat

If you actively follow the goings-on of the horror film community, I'm sure you are aware of the phenomena I'm about to describe. You hear about a movie well before its release, websites tout exclusive stills and set visits, and then the glowing early reviews start to trickle in from the festival circuit. We've all been burned by high expectations set for a film that is undeservedly praised. Thus I approached Michael Dougherty's much-anticipated Trick 'r Treat with a healthy amount of skepticism. The reviews I had heard had just been too good to be true.

Trick 'r Treat deserves it. The film is fantastic. Now there is still a lot of hyperbole surrounding the film that will undoubtedly sour some people to it. So let me clearly state what it is not before I proceed to gush. What it is not: it is not a "serious" horror film. In fact there is quite a bit of gallows humor thrown in. I've read backlash from people on Amazon who (while obviously having poor taste) had no idea the kind of film they would be watching and once it was clear that this wasn't a slasher film, went on to berate the film for not being one.

What it is: the first real attempt to make a movie for the holiday we all love. Think of Trick 'r Treat as the Miracle on 34th Street of Halloween. You've probably heard similar descriptions in other reviews but this film is really a "for us, by us" kind of thing. A film that really gets what we like about the holiday in the first place. The folklore and the commercialization, the innocent joy we feel as a kid and the sleaziness we recognize as adults, if it's part of Halloween it shows up here.

The comparisons to Creepshow and Tales from the Crypt that you've heard are accurate. The film even tries to produce that same EC comics aesthetic, but I would suggest that Trick 'r Treat is better than those, in fact it is my favorite anthology film ever.

To categorize it as an anthology is also a bit of a cop-out, because it does not follow the traditional narrative structure for an anthology. There is no framing device and then three separate short films. The stories in Trick 'r Treat are interconnected and at times intercut, a tactic that greatly improves on the old format and alleviates what is a constant detractor in all anthologies: some stories are better than others. The intercuts ensure that even if a particular story is not your cup of tea, you wont have to stay with it until you are board and taken out of the film as a result.

The cinematography is gorgeous and slick. You can almost smell the pumpkins and dead leaves. The film was obviously made with a wide release in mind and it shows. The FX and production design are top notch. The cast is equally impressive with great turns from two of my favorite actors Dylan Baker and Brian Cox who both camp-it-up while still retaining their dignity and believability. There is also an appearance from the stunning Anna Paquin, who will hopefully sell some DVDs on her new found True Blood fame alone, and Battlestar Galactica's Tahmoh Penikett.

But to every white puffy cloud there is a touch of gray. Warner Brothers treatment of this film has been abominable. First they let the film sit on the shelf for over a year only to unceremoniously dump it on their "Warner Premire" label where they release such "gems" as the straight-to-disc sequel to the remake of House on Haunted Hill. Not only that but they release it on a disc that has one three minute animated short and NOTHING else (which, despite being the only extra, is very cool). To add insult to injury there is a whole slew of extras available on the Blu-ray disc. Whoever made that decision should be fired. I can see the reasoning behind rewarding people for switching over to the new format by leaving off maybe one or two extras, but to release a bare-bones DVD only to punish fans is just odious.

So if you have a Blu-ray player be sure to pick up Trick 'r Treat on that format. If you don't I still highly encourage you to vote with your dollars and buy this disc. You will be supporting quality work and telling the studio what a stupid decision they made in not giving this a theatrical run. Don't let the extremists on either side ruin it for you. It's not the "best horror film evar" but if you love the holiday season, I know it will become a yearly staple in your home.

...It's just a pity Warner Bros. had to release it in such an undignified manner.

A Zombie Filled Day Continues: Feast of Flesh IX

Last night I attended “J. Cannibal’s Feast of Flesh IX” at the Coolidge Corner Theater and it was a night of zombie themed madness that will be hard to forget. I’ve been in Boston for the last four years and this has been the first time I have been able to attend one of these (every show consists of a different band and film) and after walking out of last night’s; boy am I ashamed I’ve missed so many.

The evening started out with my hair and makeup girl (read: girlfriend) applying some bargain-basement Halloween face paint to make me look adequately undead. I then took the 10 minute walk to the theater, being met with a mix of amusement and bewilderment from the Brookline pedestrians.

Arriving at the Coolidge a half hour before show time I took my place in the line that had already wrapped around the block, and waited. Once we were all allowed inside we were greeted by the sounds of Walter Sicker & The Army of Broken Toys. The Army is one part spooky string ensemble and performance art troupe. They played several original numbers and a few covers (Johnny Cash and Elvis as I guarantee you’ve never heard them) all while delighting/disturbing with their onstage antics and encouraging the crowd to sing along. You should really check out their website and throw them some support if you like what you hear.

After the band’s brief set it was time for the first burlesque act of the night. A member of Black Cat Burlesque took the stage dressed as a blood-spattered Jackie O and then proceeded to strip town to American Flag pasties. Offensive? Yes, you don’t know the half of it. Hilarious and awesome? Yes, you don’t know the half of it.

After that came the costume contest. There was some great talent on display including a quartet of zombie Spice Girls and even a zombie “Dude” from The Big Lebowski. I really have to up my game next year and be a competitor.

The final act before the film was a preview of Black Cat Burlesque’s next show which is a salute to Edgar Allen Poe (next Saturday the 10^th at the Brattle Theater in Cambridge, they are showing Dario Argento and George Romero’s Two Evil Eyes. I’ll see you there!). The piece was a Poe alcohol fueled fever-dream mixed with Benny Hill. It had remarkably cool costuming and production values and I can’t wait to see the rest of the show.

The main event was a screening of Dan O’Bannon’s Return of the Living Dead (1985), a film near and dear to my heart. I’ve seen it a number of times but I don’t know if I ever enjoyed it as much as seeing it with hundreds of screaming, hooting and applauding fans. While eavesdropping, which is something I frequently do, I was shocked at how many people had never seen it before. Everyone enjoyed it and I’m glad those who weren't familiar had such a good venue for their first time. Even if it is strange to hear that a person dressed as a zombie hasn’t seen one of the biggest and best films out there.

The film was played at maximum volume, which is possibly the best way to watch the most “punk rock” zombie flick ever. I don’t know if I’ve ever heard any crowd go as wild as when Clu Gulager takes the Tar Zombie’s head off with a baseball bat. Pure bliss.

If you’re in the Boston area I cannot stress how awesome these events are. Check out Black Cat Burlesque and J. Cannibal’s websites for information on upcoming shows.

*The poster art above was done by Mister Reusch, a freelance artist and Co-Founder of Black Cat Burlesque. Check out his stuff here and here.

Woody Vs. The Living Dead: Zombieland

I walked into a 2:15 showing of Zombieland today and was completely gobsmacked. The theater was absolutely packed. The movie had won me over before the trailers had even rolled. I was in an R-rated horror movie, at midday, in the largest theater in the multiplex and it was filled to capacity. That warmed the cockles of my heart.

As for the movie itself, it lived up to the theater's expectations (everyone was whooping and cheering), but maybe not to the impossibly great buzz that the critical community has hoisted on it. Don’t get me wrong; when Zombieland works it is one of the best horror comedies of all time. The problem is that it also tries to shoehorn in a lot of dramatic moments that don’t always jive with the rest of the film, all while trying to maintain its light, goofy tone. Tonal shifts are no problem. Shaun of the Dead (it is literally impossible not to mention that other zombie comedy) is a great example; in its final act it straddles the line between comedy and straight-zombie movie with apparent ease. Zombieland never attempts this kind of balancing act. That’s great, it wasn’t Ruben Fleischer’s intent to ape Shaun, but those looking for either a laugh-a-minute comedy or a “scary” film might be a bit disappointed as the movie is really neither.

One area it doesn’t skimp is the gore. Zombies are dispatched in some gruesomely hilarious ways. There are some wonky moments in the finale but outside of that the effects are generally great. They are a good mix of traditional makeup and tastefully done CGI.

The young cast does a good job but it should come as no surprise that the real star here is Woody Harrelson. The man owns every scene he’s in and his character, Tallahassee, is destined to stand just below Ash (Bruce Campbell) and Peter (Ken Foree) as one of cinema’s top zombie killing badasses.

Also, I’m sure it’s been mentioned in other reviews but the film might have one of the best credits sequences of all time. Period.

To be totally honest with you, I’m a little tired of zombies. The genre has been glutted with films (both good and bad) over the past few years, but Zombieland is a film that gets it right. It’s a funny, smart, well-made film that keeps the self reference to a minimum and focuses on delivering good old zombie-smashing fun. I wouldn’t categorize it as a classic (and it definitely doesn’t de-throne Shaun of the Dead), but there is probably no better way to mix some laughs in with your blood this weekend.

Now for some more zombies: I’m attending a midnight screening of the 80s classic Return of the Living Dead!

Hooray October!

The Girl's Got Bite: Deadgirl

Marcel Sarmiento and Gadi Harel's feature directorial debut, Deadgirl, is a coming of age story like no other. To describe it as a mix of Stand By Me and Night of the Living Dead would not be wholly inaccurate, but it would be a bit of a disservice to the originality on display.

The film centers on two high school friends who cut class to go drink in an abandoned building only to stumble on a chained and naked woman who, they find out, cannot be killed. The plot revolves around the ideological split between the two friends. The quieter of the two, Rickie (Shiloh Fernandez), wants to do the right thing and tell someone about the girl and the other, JT (Noah Segan) wants to keep the girl for sex. Add to this a meddling third friend, a love interest for Rickie, and a couple of jock bullies and you have an exciting film that's heavy on social and sexual commentary, but never too heavy.

Far too often horror films that choose to purposely imbue feminist readings and other allegorical flourishes into their narrative fall flat, but Deadgirl will incite debate and thought without having to sacrifice any power as a story that can be taken at face value.

The film is written by Troma alum Trent Haaga and for all the its ingenuity the script also proves to be one of its few shortcomings: characters act in inexplicable ways, the action drags in places, and the dialogue could use some work. None of these are major flaws and once the film gets to its action-loaded final act they all but disappear.

Dark Sky Films, an outfit known mostly for their great re-issues of older films (some highlights include Simon, King Of the Witches, Werewolves on Wheels, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer) deserves a thumbs up for acquiring and releasing the film. I do feel that the bonus materials could have used a little beefing up (the only "making of" material is a short EPK and a commentary) but for such a modestly budgeted effort like this it's great we have any material at all.

Although it's not perfect, Deadgirl is still a dark, sharply-photographed film that tries to do something different and for that it is more than worth picking up.